Join us on an unforgettable journey as we explore the rich history and unique flavor of Paix Dieu, a French beer with a Belgian twist, and the captivating world of cinematic history and Hollywood blockbusters. Ever wondered how a French beer with a surprising whiff of Coors Banquet could become your next favorite brew? Curious about the historical accuracies and inaccuracies in Ridley Scott's "Napoleon" and how they measure up against his other historical fiction, "The Last Duel"?
Strap in as we take a deep dive into the intriguing world of French breweries and the meticulous art of beer-making. We'll unravel the story of Brasserie Collier's Paix Dieu, a beer that teases the senses with its unique aroma and flavor profile. Experience the joy of discovery as we recount our adventures in France, offering you insider tips on where you can get your hands on this rare find in the States. From the allure of its unique packaging to the complexity of its taste, this beer promises to be a delightful experience for all beer enthusiasts.
But that's not all. We'll also pull back the curtain on the world of Hollywood, analyzing the portrayal of the French emperor in Ridley Scott's "Napoleon". We'll discuss the movie's mixed reviews and the portrayal of Napoleon's complex relationships, and even compare it with another Ridley Scott's historical fiction, "The Last Duel". Hear our candid views on the film's historical accuracy, the intriguing dialogue, and character development, and discover why we think "Napoleon Dynamite" was such an unexpected success. Whether you're a connoisseur of beer, an ardent movie buff, or just curious to know more, this episode promises to be a roller coaster ride of flavors, history, and cinema, guaranteed to entertain and enlighten you. So, grab a glass of your preferred brew, get comfortable, and let's dive in together!
We ride together we die together.
Speaker 2:Bad boys for life.
Speaker 1:Get busy living. Fuck that busy diet. Game first it's last, please don't entertain, oh, you don't entertain Welcome to Brews and Reviews with Makin' Pat, al Mick and I'm Pat, and each week we sit down with you degenerates, to pretend we're certified Ciceroans and Cynophiles.
Speaker 2:That is right. So grab a cold one and join us as we review Brassiere, collier, pédi and Ridley Scott's Napoleon and if you've been with us before, you know what time it is.
Speaker 1:Release the Kraken. Nice. That's not even fake sound dude, that was the actual quirk that you guys just heard. Yeah, bad news actually for our Ken out there who are stateside Pat brought this beer back from France when he was over there, so I guess it's gonna be kind of hard for a lot of you to get a taste. But you know what? I bet it's available in some import areas. Go to your big warehouse liquor store and see if you can import it or order it and try a little bit. Are those Foley bubbles coming through your Mm-hmm, oh yeah. Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2:Wow.
Speaker 1:Is that it Battle empty. I think there's a couple more.
Speaker 2:I don't know if it'll fit in these glasses we might have to.
Speaker 1:Oh, do some seconds. It might be awful too, so Looks like there's still some in there.
Speaker 2:So yeah, on my trip to France I was thinking, man, what a great opportunity to bring back a French beer. And so I went to a grocery store and picked one up and wrapped it up and all my clothes and hoped it wouldn't explode. And then we're serving it kind of the Euro style. It's not cold. I kind of did that intentionally.
Speaker 1:Is it? Well, I bet you can't read the bottle anyways, but I wonder if the bottle says to like serve it at room temperature or not.
Speaker 2:I don't think it does, but it is. So all that about going to France and getting this bottle of beer and bringing it back. It is like I said, the Brasserie Collier is the brewery and the name of it is Padeux. So these are all French words, the assumption this was a French beer I didn't read the back, but it is a triple from a Belgian brewery, so still from a you know it's got some French words and French title and from a brewery that is also French-ish, french-adjacent. But Padeux means peace of God, or God's peace, and Brasserie Collier. Brasserie is just a French word for brewery and then Collier is word of the word for necklace, so that's.
Speaker 1:So necklace brewery.
Speaker 2:Yeah, something like that. But you know it's funny because in French it just sounds more elegant. You know, brasserie Collier.
Speaker 1:I'm going to tell you that I got a French pet name for Billie Jean.
Speaker 2:No, what's that?
Speaker 1:Her contact on my phone is first name and then her nickname and quotes last name and it's Mumbo Boutain de Boudin. What does this mean? I don't know for you to know, but anyone who speaks French out there is probably laughing like, oh, that's funny. But it's not a dirty pet name by anything like that, it's just a funny French name. I heard that it was like a pet name that French lovers give to each other. I will say first off, like first immediate thing I know is this smells like I mean maybe just has a strong smell of Coors Banquet.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:It's Coors Banquet smelling through a dude.
Speaker 2:Like immediately.
Speaker 1:I don't even know if it's like it's not bananas it's just like Just Malty. You know what I mean Not happy at all, just malty, but that was like the. If I close my eyes that's Coors Banquet, for sure.
Speaker 2:That's funny, but the smell is true, the so it is On the bottle. Here we got this exceptional Belgian triple 10% is only brewed during the full moon. It's smooth and full of character, a craft beer in the tradition of Belgian Abbey beers.
Speaker 1:Wait, is that English on the back, or did you translate?
Speaker 2:it. It's got both. It's got French angst. What if I translated it live? Speed like that, would you be impressed?
Speaker 1:I don't know why, but I thought you already spoke French, Probably because you look like. You look like the stunt double of someone who's acting as the three musketeers.
Speaker 2:I was gonna say I look like a musketeer right now which has been enjoyable. I've been reading that book but the See how we got the French vibes going on this little French pencil mustache I excuse for a mustache. I got going on the curly locks, but Nope, not from France. I've been there once and this is a beer from there. So the let's see what else about this brewery. Let's learn about it. Kind of cool story. I think 1933. I'm waiting.
Speaker 1:I keep getting, I'm waiting. It's like 1933. Charles Collier left his tech job to become To pursue his passion and, being a micro brew, exactly he started it in his basement.
Speaker 2:No, he was In the 30s. He actually in a small village. He became a Basically a beer reseller. So he wasn't a brewer but he was distributor for it. He had a company distributing beer. Then he started Right after Second World War. He got his first van, started really growing his business with a post-war economic boom. They have a panel here about the 1960s but there's no word. So I don't know what happened in the 60s. But then in the 80s Looked like his children took over the family business and they they kept on growing as a warehouse company. And then it was in 1996, they started brewing their own beer as well and so they've been a company for a long time in the beer industry for a long time. So, as brewing goes, started doing that in 1996. And they've just kind of been growing since then. They have basically three staple beers the Bon Secure, the Pedia and the Stutt, and I don't know about the other two but, like I said, the Pedia is brewed during only the full moons. That's kind of cool though, which is kind of a tradition of how they used to do the Belgian Abbey beers.
Speaker 1:They see. You think, though, like what if they're like werewolves? Like how do you keep track of the full moon so well, exactly Like I only know it's a full moon when I walk outside and I see it, you know what I mean For sure, but I think it's time to give it the swish test.
Speaker 2:Push it through the teeth.
Speaker 1:All right, pat, take your tablespoon amount in your mouth, let it roll over the back of your tongue underneath the sides, and then go ahead and switch side to side and stick that tongue against the roof of your mouth and push it through the front of your teeth. Get a nice little foamy suds. I mean. Definitely tasted way more like banana bread to me doing that than just like normal sips. Also, not a bad, hear me out, it's not a certainly no stout ale.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Accredness, but it is. There is an acridness to it.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm, it's not like just acidic. I don't know how to describe it other than an acrid.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:And that's a harsh word, but it's more than acidic.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I think the thing we have to keep in mind is that it's a 10 percent Sure, yeah, right.
Speaker 1:For what it's a 10 percent triple.
Speaker 2:So for what you're tasting, though, because it's advertised as smooth. It is smooth, so it's pretty smooth. But yeah, the, and so I just I just found on here. This is the. At the buildings. On the nose, it reveals a delicate, fruity and spicy aromas is what it says.
Speaker 1:It does have a little bit of a. I would say the acridness kind of reminds me of spices a little bit.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm and the on the eye a cloudy Uh Padoe is distinguished by its golden color and under a creamy, generous, inconsistent foam which I'm wondering how maybe different it could be from tap or like from, I don't know, not flying in an airplane with it or whatever. And what's it got on here? On in the mouth, it reveals its character and develops a long and fine bitterness supported by a hint of hops.
Speaker 1:That's probably the where it gets. The acrid he tastes is a little bit of hops, with that bitterness. Yeah, I would say, uh, fruity. I'm not sure if I taste fruity other than the nanner, um, but I will say that if I, if someone came up to me and, hey man, imagine I'm on Tucky Cold Snack or Coors Banker, banker, bankwit, and imagine it at 10%, not three and a half or four, I'd say okay, and then, if they gave me this, I'd be like that tastes exactly what I imagined. You know what I mean. Like it does taste like, uh, it tastes like a craft beer. It tastes like Coors first craft beer yeah. I mean, like Coors light came out or Coors brewery came out with their first craft beer, I'd be like, well, that tastes what. That tastes like this.
Speaker 2:It's like have you ever seen pictures of dog breeds that are just old looking? I think we even talked about it on the podcast.
Speaker 1:Like there's certain dogs you can tell are ancient just by the like you mean the species has been around for a while, or you mean like the dog is just not not, not the dog, the species, you know that just looks old, like an old thing that's been around for a while.
Speaker 2:I feel like that about like when I have different beers around the world it just feels like there's like it's just like a fountain. There's something in this where it's just it's just a beer. It's been around for a very long time. Yeah, it's just been around for a little bit, with it much, and so, like, when you get newer craft breweries, micro brews, it has all these different flavors and things going on and this just feels like a like. They've done it a billion times. Yeah, and it's just is what it is. It's been made for centuries.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they're like this is a beer, it's made in a building in France that has an address and also a year. It was built on the over, like over the front door.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:It's been built before.
Speaker 2:America, yep, yep, exactly. Just as like, just when you go to other places in the world than old beers, I feel like it's just a just tastes like a beer, cause that's like a lot of people say, like what's a Kuhur's tastes like man, what's Montaille tastes like. Piss, piss water tastes like a beer, you know but it's like piss you like to drink.
Speaker 1:I don't really know how to explain it, yeah, but it's still. I always explain what is it? The Mexican beer.
Speaker 2:Corona A Corona.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I have this good family friend whose last name is Hernandez I won't give away his real name cause you know he's actually a very prominent person and public servant stuff but he just like I just remember he let me have a sip of his Corona once and he was like, yeah, it's pretty much just mixed can piss with lime and I was like.
Speaker 2:For a long time I was like what if he wasn't joking?
Speaker 1:What if Corona? What if he just gave me a bottle that he pissed it and like and then it's like you know, grew up I was like oh, that's just always the description that stuck with me and like that's how I've always described Corona to someone else. It's like it's like mixed can piss, but just with lime in it. And I you know this is, that's a tangent, because this doesn't taste like this this day is really good. But yeah, I'm pretty. I'm pretty pleased with it, pat. I don't know if there's really anything else to say other than that you know it's. It's a pleasant surprise, I think, especially when you said how much it. Excuse me what the alcohol content was. I was, I was a kind of just startled because it doesn't have the sour flavor that I would expect, like some other trapeze I've had that are high in, like a higher alcohol content in them, and also it doesn't have that nasty hops after taste. It has a very balanced. Like I said, it's accurate, but it's a good accurate. So I don't know, is there anything else, before we give it a Thummies, that you'd like to touch on?
Speaker 2:No, yeah, I think that when I was over in France, a lot of the beers I had tasted very similar to this, oh, really Like of this style. But this one is definitely. I think it's just like you're saying it for for how high the alcohol content is pretty smooth and just it's an easy drinker.
Speaker 1:And anyone who likes banana beers is going to like this for sure. I think this is a very pleasing gift to someone who's who enjoys those kind of more Belgian German beers. Alrighty, I'm going to give it. I'm going to give it a thumb up. This would be a great first trapel, a great first European beer. You know, if all you've had is like cheap American beer or cheap India or Korean beer and then you go to Europe, this would be a great first Kind of Belgian beer to have. I think so well it's, I like it, I think it's delicious.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm going one thumb as well. It's just a good beer, the. Yeah, I can't remember the price tag on it, not that I could remember even.
Speaker 1:Anyways, yeah, you know you'd remember it if it hurt.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but the little bit is the problem, though. I was using like euros on like my last day. So it's like you don't? You like you don't you know the conversion rates already screwed up and you're like I just got to spin this stuff. So, yeah, I don't remember, but the and I saline, I just goes pretty reasonable and I, saline.
Speaker 1:I just found out how much Icelandic Croners are to a hundred bucks. I just measured everything with that because I was like I'm not gonna try to. I'm not. I'm just gonna try to relax and be chill about this and not like panic over 10 bucks. My math is off, though. It was definitely like there's that couple times I was like, oh, that's just a hundred bones. And then I was like I don't know, with tax that ended up being like to Hondo.
Speaker 2:Iceland's expensive. You're sure about the Icelandic taxation.
Speaker 1:Was France expensive? Do you remember like stuff being more or less? I've always heard France is like if you're not getting Commercial goods like clothing, apparel, trinkets, if you're getting just like food, beverage, a tour, like I've always heard, those things are pretty cheap actually.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'd say comparatively to, like I Said, in many ways it is like compared. You can compare it to America, meaning, like you know, if you are in, you know, just a normal town, you know 10, 15 bucks for a meal, right, and if you go to Vale, you know it's gonna be 25, right. So, like you know, pretty similar to that. Like you know, if we were ocean side Eating stuff, it felt pretty similar and then certain places were cheaper. Certainly the things that were cheaper that's kind of cool was like wine was way cheaper. Yeah, nice wine was way cheaper, and then also a really good baguettes and really good cheese was way cheaper. Yeah so that's awesome, that was the cool stuff. Like to enjoy that stuff there. And then Everything else felt fairly reasonable. I'd say I was probably just a little cheaper than America. And also I'm wondering to what like if interesting to see how inflation hits where when like are we cheaper? Two years ago, on certain it was pretty close, I'm like, but I felt like it was a. There's other places. I've traveled other places I've been to where it's um, yeah, you get like the, you know the, go to Mexico. It's like 50 cent beers, is not that? But it's also not like other places. I've been to where it was. You know, you, you feel like you're bleeding. I feel like if you go on vacation in America, you feel like you're bleeding money way more.
Speaker 1:Definitely, depending where right, yeah, yeah but yeah, definitely depending where.
Speaker 2:Then also especially to like we were in like big nice towns too, mm-hmm, and like it didn't feel the same as like if you were, and you know, at a Rockies game, and it's like you know, 15 bucks for a beer or whatever, like that sort of thing. Like it was, it was pretty reasonable and their McDonald's serves beer.
Speaker 1:That's awesome, you get a.
Speaker 2:Heineken there. It's pretty fun. That's great, it's hilarious.
Speaker 1:Well, with that, pat, how did, uh, how did your recent trip to France kind of set your expectations for Napoleon? You know, we, we, we both saw it in the last week ish. And I've never been to France, I'm just been around it, mm-hmm. I've pretty much been to everywhere that is either conquered or freed it, but never been to France itself but, I was just wondering yeah, like I, because I mean you went on that trip not too long ago. That was just what this summer, right into the summer.
Speaker 2:Yeah, just this summer, and I think that, uh, it didn't change my expected expectations for the movie too much and that I was just excited to maybe like see some scenery, maybe places I'd been, or Maybe understand a little bit more of historical context where I might have been going on Mm-hmm, one thing that I did Excuse me, gain some context for, was when we did go out to an island for a day which would have been very similar to the island islands at the point at the middle and end of his life was Exiled to. But you didn't go to like St Elba, we didn't go to his island of, we went to like very similar like. There's a couple islands off the coast of the south of France where it's just like, just far enough, where you can't swim to get back and uh, but you know, the in its, yeah, they would have outpost out there too as For defense and things, but yeah, it was very, uh, it was cool to be on that island that had some prisons and like old ruins and stuff that would have been very similar to the, so the prisons and stuff he would have been in and what it would have looked like for him looking out the Mediterranean, gotcha. Well, let's, uh, let's get into a man Napoleon.
Speaker 1:Napoleon just released In the last month of November, right at the end of it, in time for Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving movies and, uh, thanksgiving movies usually dropped to try to be hits. But sometimes people roll out their Movies they don't think are gonna perform very well and if we look at the critics and user reviews on Rotten Tomatoes and IMDB, it seems like Napoleon might have been Something that it's what it's hard to tell if it was Ridley Scott or you know producers, um, but it might have been one of the ones that was rolled out in November because they didn't have a lot of faith it was gonna be in theaters for very long. I'll say this Just so people already know Oppenheimer this is not, uh, this is not gonna be in theaters for I mean Oppenheimer still in theaters, and it came out in what? june, july? I gotta go see it. Yeah, you do. I'm pretty disappointed. There you have him, um, but anyways, uh, directed by Ridley Scott, the lead is walking phoenix. Supporting cast is Tahar Raheem, rupert Everett, vanessa Kirby, who she plays Josephine Boda part. Also, her boobs play a big role. I mean, like I swear to god, they really wanted her boobs to be like on the cusp of coming out of her shirt for 90% of the movie, but only one at a time. Yeah, it was just like one of those things there was like why is it no one else's boobs about to fall out?
Speaker 2:Yeah, but in boob it was. It really was just like one or the other that was about to. Yeah, it was a.
Speaker 1:It was interesting and I don't think there's any boobs in the whole movie. No no for anyone who's thinking Can I bring my kids to this? Or something like yeah, like there's no excessive nudity, no orgies, yeah, I did, but that there's.
Speaker 2:There's a couple. See, I wouldn't want my I'd say this sitting with my brother-in-law next to my dad during the movie and then have to sit next to each other during those some of those sex scenes was uh.
Speaker 1:Oh, I forget. I actually totally forgot there was like the kind of comedic sex scenes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and they're like they're funny, but but they're not trying to be funny, I think, I think they are.
Speaker 1:I think they're trying to make it look like Uh well, yeah, we're getting into it. We're getting into right now this movie. Really, I'm just saying maybe don't take your kids. Yeah, I would say, I wouldn't say don't take your kids, but like it wouldn't be the worst first movie they watched with a sex scene in it, that's for sure. Like this one Could be just hilarious conversation afterwards. Or your child's like Dad, what the was that sex? You could be? Like, well, kind of, let me we break it down for you, you know what, but anyways, um, yeah, so it's a napoleon. Uh, plot summary I mean, apparently it's a story that details the checkered rise and fall french emperor napoleon, bone apart, and his relentless journey to power through his addictive, volatile relationship with his wife, josephine. Um, yeah, so you know. Also, if you're not familiar with really scott, uh, gladiator, alien, aliens or aliens might have been james cameron, um, but alien was really scott. Um, I'm trying to think, oh, blade runner, blade runner 2049, um, incredible director, has produced some real bangers. I don't see some real stinkers, um, and this one seems to have divided a lot of people. Um, but yeah to to, as you know, pat, as you're kind of get into it the sex scenes. I think we're supposed to be depicting a man, napoleon, who has done war, this has gone and seen men, died, been repulsed by violence, been Maybe traumatized a little bit, uh, but he's probably never had Anyone really tell him how to be a good lover. He's probably never had the confidence to ask for Someone to teach him how to be a good lover. Mm-hmm, and the sex scenes that he's in, that he has with josephine, I think to really reflect a man who doesn't know how to have sex and like Satisfy a woman, and it seems like that could almost characterize the whole film to me in regards to the depiction of napoleon, like this does not in any way, I think, try to depict depoleon as the great, uh tactical genius and conquer that he was. Um, it really tries to, I think. Go out and show him as like a stunted, kind of Honestly reminds me of hall pass kid. Just reminds me of the same of, like the kid who Was on a hall pass duty in school, wore the sash and walked around asking to see people's all, asking to see other kids, hall passes and uh, it just I don't know man, it just it was, it was not. I think I would now ever want to be portrayed this way.
Speaker 2:You know, that's what I mean that's where, yeah, after, after we watched this movie, I think my dad was like, uh, he's like Napoleon would kill walking phoenix for the, for the way he portrayed him in this movie. Like you know, as far as like the, because it is like if we're, yeah, we're getting into like the, the sex scene throughout the gate, where it's like, first of all, I like to call him in this movie a napoleon bones a lot, oh nice, because there's just a lot of. You know, it's just I think we only see him bone twice, right, I think it's only like two sex scenes, but then it's like a lot of like, it's a lot of foreplay.
Speaker 1:A lot of like, like they're about to have sex because a lot of a lot of the plot line around.
Speaker 2:You know Him and Josephine's story is them trying to have a kid, yeah right, which involves the, the banging, and so he. I think the funniest what I don't think they're. I don't know if they were trying to be funny enough, but the the funniest thing that he said was after the first time they get done, he goes Um, made the good work here, produce a son. Yeah, yeah it's like it's like I think I was supposed to laugh at that. I thought they were trying to be funny, but then I just like I thought it was hilarious. I think I, but the problem is that's why I think this movie was such a big miss where it was like I don't even think they were trying to be funny, I think they were just. I don't think they knew what the fuck they were doing Walking.
Speaker 1:this was no, yeah, but this is walking phoenix.
Speaker 2:Um playing walking phoenix, playing napoleon.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it really you're. No, that's a good character. They're like I've seen walking phoenix do a lot of really diverse roles and this feels like the Gosh. What was the movie? He just joker bo's afraid. Oh, bo's afraid. So bo's afraid just came out from 824, this wacky movie with, like, where he's just Seeing things and he's got a lot of built-up trauma from his family and stuff and he's on this journey across in an america that's kind of post apocalyptic, but not post apocalyptic, apocalyptic like it's in the midst of it and, um, it's just like one of the best performances I think I've ever seen him do, because it's really entertaining to watch him. The movie itself is weird and Definitely hit or miss with a lot Um, but then, yeah, no, to that point too, like joker. Joker was not funny, that was serious Mm-hmm, and that was also like philosophically serious, because you're like this is definitely a deranged, evil individual that it's not hard To identify like it's pieces with yeah, I mean maybe not even identify pieces with as much as like just to Um, empathize, you know, or, and at least just Genuinely want good fortune to come upon Mm-hmm, which is weird, um, and then this it's like to me, it's like it looks more like uh, bo's afraid was Asked to play Napoleon and like that. That it was so weird to me, you know yeah um, and I think tonally it couldn't pick a tone, because there were times where I was like, oh, this is war movie and I was like, oh, it's about the turn, it's about to happen, it's about to shift.
Speaker 2:No, no, because it never. Um. We're kind of bouncing all around here on our review because it is hard to review this movie in some ways because there was no good um plot line to follow. There was no story arc to really follow it doesn't even follow, like the description, mm.
Speaker 1:Hmm, like I don't think he's that obsessive over Josephine. Are you kidding me, bro? If I had, if I had a woman with all of her teeth and not STDs, during the Napoleonic era and I was away at war, I would constantly be just writing her and wanting to get back home and wanting her to write and tell me yes, you are the love of my life. I beg to have you back, you know, in our bed again. That doesn't even change, dude. That's like what all guys who go to war today still want you know, what I mean. So it's like I'm like this doesn't even seem obsessive. Mm, hmm like, especially too, because he gets to like the. He kind of gets they. I don't know, they don't really depict him seeking out royalty, I think.
Speaker 2:Mm, hmm.
Speaker 1:But it's very much like suggested to him and like emphasize, like you should do this whether you want it to or not, right, and uh, the whole idea of an error wasn't even a big deal until they made him king, right and like, so, with that, like, I don't even think that part of it was obsessive, like, and so I'm just like I don't think this movie is what it was described as, like definitely a guy with probably like some mommy issues, mm hmm, and I think that is definitely alluded to Mm hmm but he loves his wife and he loves. He loves his wife because he's batting out of his league, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And the uh it's, I feel like to the, where they the big miss here was never endearing us to their relationship with one another. We didn't, we didn't care when they ended up breaking up because, uh, here's the deal. Uh, they were just, they were in an abusive, gross, weird relationship. Yeah, there was no. We never saw them love each other. No, even in the sex scenes. Those were F scenes. Those weren't sex scenes.
Speaker 1:I think they depicted him as loving her. I think I think they like there was a miss, there was misaligned values, but I definitely think, like it was depicted like especially spoilers when she dies not spoilers. You've had 300 years to learn about this, um, but uh, like you know, when she dies, that to me is not someone who's upset because he doesn't get to have his way. That, to me, is a man who's lost a lover.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:It's a. I don't think she would have cried over him, though, right, I think she all like she was depicted as, whether it's accurate or not, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Power, power, power seeker, yeah.
Speaker 1:I need your money and the security gives me a life.
Speaker 2:I don't think she.
Speaker 1:I don't think she's depicted as loving him very much.
Speaker 2:Right, and that's what I think they didn't. They didn't endear us to her or their relationship because it was just a abusive relationship Kind of in a in a couple of different ways. And so and the reason why we're opening talking about sex scenes and love scenes and love and relationship around a guy who waged great war upon the earth is because this movie hardly focused on warfare.
Speaker 1:It and when it did, I felt like it was more often than not trying to show like he didn't. He didn't do that much. There was like other people who did more Right. There was other people who were giving him these ideas or helping them decide what the right choice was, which is like any real war. Right, like real war is you surround yourself with confidence who advise in. 90% of the ideas are bad, but through that it's a filter to hopefully the best strategy and you all grow and learn and adapt to the battlefield. Right, and I'm. I'm in the middle of this civil war book on a Stonewall Jackson called rebel yell. Everyone should listen to it. But listening to that, I'm like this is what this movie should have been, because it's a, it's a biography on Stonewall Jackson, but it spends so much time with other generals and confidence in like, who he was, you know, originally a reporting to, and then how he grows up and others report to him and the duality of like. He went to school at West Point with a lot of the generals and majors and kernels on the union side and he knew him and he, you know, was in class and we're friends with some of them. Right, and that would have been sick to know more about that and Napoleon's you know difficulties and friendships that he made more and less of like, this kind of like. Haha, this guy really isn't all that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, cause I felt like they. They did the battle scenes while like, cinematically they were awesome, there was all they. I feel like all they. I think I was getting a spoon fed Some classic modern day Hollywood stuff and uh, in that, all that I was supposed to feel during this battle scene was colonialism is the devil, and and you have to watch young men die during this battle scene, like, like there was no, like, no sense of even like a, not necessarily good versus evil, but like good versus bad, or like, or just like you know, a side to root for. And and then, in battle, regardless of um, the big powers at play, the individual dudes at play are valiant on both sides, and that's why we love to watch these big war scenes, cause there is a um, this, uh, a chance for men in the ultimate arena to prove themselves. And so during these these epic, multi-million dollar battle scenes, it was like I felt like there was no emotion to be evoked, except for I'm supposed to feel kind of just bad and weird about what just happened, which that's not why I go to see a movie. Well, it's not why I go to see this movie, especially because as a if even with with Napoleon yes, some guy who makes himself emperor he that he's a dictator. He sent many men to die on battlefield. He, uh, in other ways, he also like the rules he installed. Um, took away a lot of women's rights that they'd gained uh, all these different things you could say about him. He was a brilliant tactician and warfighter and like, focus on that a little more. Give in great credit where credit's due. Um, without using the backwards lens.
Speaker 1:Well, here's the thing there's not a name before Napoleon that we compared to after Napoleon right. Like you, we don't. We still don't compare uh great generals of today like uh Stonewall Jackson, ulysses S Grant, robert E Lee. They're compared to Napoleon, um big uh World War II guy, not Dwight D Eisenhower, but the uh Penn Penn. It was known as America's Napoleon, the Napoleon of Europe, right, which is weird, like they said. You know, the Napoleon of the Europe theater.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Um and so with that, you like, I think there's plenty of room in these things, these movies, for comedy, for brevity, for showing the real person, and you know, that's part of the reason why I love this biography too, on Stonewall Jackson is because it it does point out his flaws there is your fall shorts and his awkward in, and that like I think there's room for that in these movies. So much of this movie, though, was was boring and it was filled with boring things that I don't think anyone really cared about. I don't even and here's the biggest crime. Is that real Napoleon? Historic diehard fans also aren't going to get what they want, because they're going to watch this movie and see how much of it is fake, how much of it is like made up by Ridley Scott and his writers and did not happen the way it's depicted, right, and so it's like why would you spend so much time on these things that are not entertaining, these boring like imaginations of what Napoleon was doing and what him and his wife were doing and what they were scheming to, when that's not even real? Who's going to watch that and care? And so I want to be honest. The movie's not good. The movie's bad, in my opinion. There's moments in it that are funny, there's moments of it that are entertaining and action packed, but it's it's biggest crime is not being historically inaccurate in making up facts about Napoleon, it's that it did that and it decided to be boring still.
Speaker 2:Like it did a dirty thing. It was more boring than the real life story. Yeah, so they um. So how do you do that? Yeah, Especially when it's like you to take on Napoleon's story. It's chock full of all sorts of cool backdrops, stories, battles, conquering, and which you can then hyperbolize the story. But they didn't do that at all, they just and the. The other thing where I think they probably initially also start to or foundationally where they went wrong, was maybe biting off such a huge chunk of time because his whole life yeah. Because in order to pack everything you need to know for what's going on over this you know 40 year period it covers they just keep having to make these big jumps. And you especially have to make big jumps if every other scene is a five to 10 minute scene of him and his wife having a weird conversation.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, sometimes 30 minutes yeah, sometimes it was 30 minutes of just them going from one room to the next room, to the next scene and interacting with people and I was just like, go like, I get it, I get it.
Speaker 2:Let's move on, yeah, or like take it on as like a four hour, you know, like if you're really going to do like an epic of like the story of this guy, right, right, and so that's what a lot of people said.
Speaker 1:It should just been a mini series, but I have some trivia points on that of why it wasn't. But yeah, I mean, pat, what do you? What do you think about? I'm ready to give it a rating because I feel like I know kind of where you stand and I know where I stand and while there's great things that I saw on the screen in those fight scenes, I'll say this set pieces were. There was a lot of CGI for some of the fight scenes and stuff that was made up. And you know, of course, Moscow and France in this time period don't exist today, Right, so all of that is CGI. But you know the, the, the heck actual interior set designs. I was like really blown away and I was like, wow, their Chateau is beautiful. That's exactly what I imagine a pre-electricity Chateau looked like and I would have loved to live there as my little cave.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:But that is all backdrop to just not fun engaging dialogue that's made up and it's just like I don't know. And here's the thing, I'm not a Napoleon stand. I have never read anything about him. I I've found this point of history rather boring. I'll be honest, postsword pre repeater carbine I don't pay that much attention to. I get pretty bored of. So Civil War I'm starting to get more interested too because this book can care more about. But like this period I just like I'm like boring war, snooze war, like not not exciting, and like I know that's like stupid. I know that's stupid. I know there's so much fascinating stuff to enjoy in this history, right. But like, as someone who's not a Napoleon stand, this movie sucked. Like I didn't suck because they did DiBoli and dirty, it sucked because by doing them dirty they couldn't come up with something more entertaining. Gladiator yeah, how real is gladiator? Not real at all.
Speaker 2:Incredibly entertaining. Yeah, you know, historically relevant, right, you know historical fiction yeah, it's great, yeah, and so I think that, yeah, I'm going two thumbs down, dude, dude, because here's the deal Like I mean, dude, have we had any movie that got that?
Speaker 1:I think let's give two thumbs down. I don't think so.
Speaker 2:I don't think so, Not even some of the bad hormones. Here's a bad three hundred thousand dollars. Three hundred thousand dollars this day, like two million dollar horror movie budget. Like I give them a little more leeway in the grading maybe. But like yeah, come on, You've got a bit of a like more money than God. Yeah, you've got a rock star season type cast and then also like a rock star director, taking on a guy in history who everybody knows his name. There's nobody on this planet earth. That's an exaggeration, but really anybody who's had any form of basic education, or just or not, is just heard the name Napoleon. It's a name of a dessert, it's a name of you know, it's it's. He is such a huge, larger than life figure. With the Napoleon complex we have the you know for in psychology we have guys to this day who still, if you're learning warfare, you're going to study the way he fought war.
Speaker 1:And above all else, we have Bill and Ted's excellent adventure, which is easily the best depiction of Napoleon I've ever seen. Right, no doubt I'd watch that movie three times. Watch this movie one more time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I will never watch this movie again. I will tell people to just not waste their time with it and I think that I'm going two thumbs down. Big miss If you like it. I don't know why you do yeah and yeah, besides the fact that the cinematic quality great from camera work other than that, no go.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'll also be honest. I didn't feel like a lot of the actors and actresses gave it their all here, like a lot of people were talking about like the excitement they had because Ridley Scott was talking just about walking Phoenix Phoenix's powerful performance as Napoleon and Vanessa Kirby's astonishing portrayal of Josephine. I was like it was both. You know wasn't corny, but it wasn't like I'm not right in home about that portrayal.
Speaker 2:And beyond that, we haven't talked about any other characters because they didn't develop any other characters that were worthy of talking about, and there's a ton.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there are tons like 50. Yeah, and it was just, it was boring. So, yeah, also with that, I'm. This is a classic example of like to me. You're given an assignment and then, rather than doing the assignment, you do your own thing because you think you could do something pretty creative here and blow, knock the socks off and have more fun doing the, the, the homework, and rather than, like me as the teacher, being like, wow, you know what. You didn't do the assignment, but what I just read was amazing and I'm going to reward you for how awesome that was, because that showed real you know, literary, literary talent, right? No, it's just like you didn't do the assignment and what you did instead sucks and I'm punishing you. Yeah, I'm punishing you because you should someone should tell you now that you're not good at this. Next, I've just stick to this. I'm like I'm also doing two thumbs down purely because of that and like I get this may be knee jerk, but I'm just like dude, really, scott, come on, dog. Like you could have made something more engaging with you know, your eyes closed, I don't know, but anyways, to that note, I got some trivia here that and some goofs in the goofs are mostly, um, actually, is you know, um, actually, ridley Scott. But the reason I want to go over those is because just how many things the movie got factually incorrect and, rather than do something cool with it, just just decided to be wrong instead. So first bit of trivia, though Ridley Scott had a script that Stanley Kubrick had written for Napoleon. Kubrick was a huge obsession for Napoleon. He wanted to do it right after doing 2001, space Odyssey, and he watched a lot of films Napoleon 1927, war and peace, 1965 that he just felt like didn't measure up to, like the full story, and he had looked around at, you know, actors and actresses, specifically like having in mind who he was writing it for. But after Waterloo, which is widely regarded as being the best Napoleon movie, just because of how many extras and horses and cannons they had on set, and it was before CGI 1970. And it's just like you know you watch it and you're like, damn, this whole movie is just the one battle and it's awesome and you can really understand what's going on. But after that kind of panned, it got put on the sidelines. But really, scott Reddit thought it was underwhelming, thought it was lame, thought it was boring, thought Kubrick's like oh, what a boring, historically accurate movie that Kubrick would have made. And then Steven Spielberg, though, has found it, and who you know? He was a good friend with Kubrick even into his late years, when he passed away. And now Spielberg, since 2013, has been working with HBO to develop into a mini series, and, as of this year, spielberg says it's still in development. It's still, you know, wheels are spinning on it so that we might get like a really battle.
Speaker 2:Yeah, a really accurate.
Speaker 1:And I mean, you know, dude, imagine Band of Brothers, right level of a series, but for Napoleonic war. And we don't just follow Napoleon, but we follow, you know, men, and like men, through all the ranks right that served under and. I think it'd be cool if Napoleon was just like bigger than God in that movie. You know, like we didn't actually spend that much time with Napoleon, we just spent more time through the eyes of, like, all those around him. Like I would love to understand the mindset of those guys who were like aiming their muskets out of and said you know what, no for the emperor dude, right. I asked him like stormtrooper shit, because here's, here's one.
Speaker 2:One point to that I was thinking of that and bring up was one thing you know that is crazy interesting about Napoleon and they did show it in the movie was that the the fact that he, after his first exile, he escapes and then comes back and raises an army large enough to fight again. That shows some incredible power and charisma to be able to, you know, be exiled, come back and raise an army of guys who are going to fight with you. And they definitely Hollywood it up the way that happened in the movie, but that doesn't change the fact that that is what happened. He came back and did raise an army again and so, yeah, there were guys out there who did want to fight for him, who did believe in him, and I think that that's also one of the big misses in this movie is where not a single person died on the battlefield, who you knew their name or give a crap that they just died, and that was why the battle scenes weren't worth anything. You know, you didn't know the single name of anybody who died out there.
Speaker 1:Also, the battle scenes were just like music montage. They were. They were mid row, like I've seen better battle scenes and like some history channel stuff. Right, I'll say Vikings, the history channel series, vikings and better battle scenes, but definitely because this was all like. it just felt like 30,000 foot view battle scenes in this and even with that, it felt like whoever was doing it didn't know how battle was fought. Fought all the time. Mm hmm, like part of me, the thing that blew. I was like, why are they bleeding when they go through the ice? Mm hmm, like cannon shells are landing on this frozen lake and then, like everyone who falls in the water is bleeding, regardless of if they got hit by the cannonball, and they're bleeding all their blood and they're like all their blood is flowing out of this frozen lake, all the blood of the horse, and I'm just like it's just in Tarantino.
Speaker 2:I was like we'd accept that cannonballs.
Speaker 1:I don't think cannonballs are hollow for the most part, hence why they're known as 32 pound balls. Right, you know what I mean. So I'm just like this, isn't Shreddnell just slicing these guys up there. It's like it's like the water is full of knives as soon as they landed it. But anyways, with that to, scott says that a four hour director's cut is coming to Apple TV. Wow, what a bummer for Apple. That's not going to get much views. I just kidding. I bet a lot of people will watch it because they'll. They have they've chosen to snooze on it in theater because they know the four hour cuts coming and they'll watch it like a mini series. Like they'll watch it for an hour and a half, turn it off, come back to it later, which I don't know, bro.
Speaker 2:Well.
Speaker 1:I will let someone correct me. You know what I mean. Yeah, unless I'm like hey man, you should watch it. It's pretty good.
Speaker 2:Like if the editor just totally goofed on this and just cut out all the good stuff? Well, that's part of me.
Speaker 1:Let's wondering. Like you know, really, scott's got more money and you know this is made by his studio and Apple Studios Like it's called Scott Free Productions in the beginning, so it's kind of like who's telling him he can't make the movie he wants, right? I definitely do think, though, the Justice League movie the Snyder cut is like it's a fine movie. Is it amazing? 10 out of 10? No, but like is it night and day difference to the dog shit that the original one was that came out.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's absolutely night and day, so I'll let people tell me if that ends up being any good. I probably. I mean it should you know what it should? It should come out the same way that Lonesome Dove did.
Speaker 2:Again many series it did yeah.
Speaker 1:An hour of peace Last. A little bit of trivia While it's never directly addressed, there is in the background. I don't even think he gets lines in the movie, but there is a black French general and he's played by Abu Kar Salim and this is credited as General Dumas. General Dumas was a real general, Thomas Alexandre Dumas, a Haitian born general who commanded troops in the Napoleonic Wars and was actually so brilliant as a tactician he was known as the Black Devil and he was also father of the writer Alexander Dumas, who went on, if I remember correctly, wrote a lot of the great plays, Dude also. I'm just saying, bro, it's never an insult to call someone the devil when, like your wage and war.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like that Black Devil Like, thank you, like I am kicking your ass.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you will fear me. Yeah, and that's where it is Like we would have loved to know about that.
Speaker 1:I would have loved to know.
Speaker 2:Like we should have been about that guy?
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly. And just let Napoleon again. Let Napoleon be that larger than life dude. Maybe he trips going up the stairs and it's like, oh, he's still human, but otherwise like give us more character, more something Two million dollar budget. What? Oh, I just forgot the movie.
Speaker 2:Sorry, $200 million budget.
Speaker 1:Okay, there we go.
Speaker 2:This article says grossing $7.1 million by the end of the second week in theaters. Not good the greater Napoleon, as in Napoleon Dynamite oh, hell yeah $400,000 budget After its release grossed 44 mil. Yeah, so as far as you know percentages, go on ROI. You know good work, napoleon Dynamite seriously who knew that was gonna go. But still this one, there they, and now they're. Looks like now it's grossed up to 46 million. Now it's been out a few more, another week or two, but I Mean they're not making money back on this one.
Speaker 1:That's a loss, that's a big L. Yeah, it's not like you know, it is not gonna be any gladiator where it makes its budget back three times over. Anyway, some goofs here, like I said, all these goofs are me actually I'm actually. After being defeated at the Battle of Waterloo, napoleon surrendered to the British onboard HMS Bellaroff on, and Even though he met people and had people come meet him, he's never met Duke of Wellington face-to-face in real life.
Speaker 2:Hmm.
Speaker 1:Also, I would say beef Wellington is a better meal than what's the Napoleon one just the Napoleon, napoleon, I can't remember would like the whole dish, but beef Wellington is hella delicious really. You never had beef Wellington. Hmm, oh my gosh, it's like the best damn pastry meat thing.
Speaker 2:Well, the yeah, but the Napoleon is a. He's a dessert, oh, is it so?
Speaker 1:But the you're not thinking of the. What's the ice cream where it's not neopollate, neopollate? You're not thinking of that.
Speaker 2:But the there's another Napoleon dish Attributed to him, that is. Yeah, it's like something weird, not not great, something you would eat on a battlefield, like beans and and lettuce and a stew or something you know. It's like. I can't remember what it is, but During Napoleon's campaign in Egypt.
Speaker 1:The top of pyramids are seen to have been targeted by cannon fire, but, um, actually there is no proof that Napoleon's army targeted the pyramids. Napoleon myself was a great admirer of ancient Egypt actually, and it's a you know, battalions of troops and its organization at the time and the sites of the civilization, and he would have unlikely ordered its targeting of the pyramids. However, it's been theorized, but likely debunked, that he fired at the Sphinx hmm Well, who knows? No iPhones. I think we know that he didn't shoot the pyramids.
Speaker 2:I think we like we know that definitively, like I don't think he was anywhere near the pyramids during his fight, like the pyramids were like still like 30 miles away lay off there, yeah, but if I was as big a deal as he was, I Could have a lot of reverence for those, me, those pyramids, and I could still be like you boys Try to hit the top of that thing here's the thing I don't think you would have even cared, because during the time Napoleon was active, the pyramids were halfway under sand.
Speaker 1:I don't think people understand that. Like Egypt, let just left them. Egypt was like, yeah, we don't, we don't reuse those anymore, and so like the whole thing of like him getting a mummy out of the pyramids, it's just all like.
Speaker 2:Bull cock.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's that scene was just for him to like look like he has mommy issues. He wants to kiss his mummy.
Speaker 2:I think it was. I think it was him trying to, I Think what he was in that scene, what they're trying to show. So I think there was actually one halfway decent scene of the movie was they were trying to show his I feel like it was going through his mind was I Will be great? And he was trying to ascertain what is greatness. Because this thing in this tomb has this monument, has greatness, yeah, in a monument built to it, and I want to be like him. But then the way they make him step up on a stool to look in it is like this, like they're like, you'll never be that great.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do think it was like a mirroring scene. For sure, it's a shame that it didn't have more and I would have loved like a nightmare, like I would have loved for him to have a nightmare of being embalmed and forgotten underground. I don't know, right I'm sure, like a man of that greatness and power, fear is he'll become like many other men of history. Right? Also, the scene showing Four men rolling a six foot cannon barrel as if they were moving a picnic basket. That barrel would have weighed 800 pounds and even decades after Napoleon, when technology had advanced to the point of the American Civil War, we still had horse teams pulling cannons. We needed to just wheel cannons around. So again, I Think it would have been sick to show horse teams like sledding cannons. That would have been dope. That's true. Napoleon is shown charging with the troops never happened. Napoleon was renowned for refusing to run in. Also, he oh sorry, he had reported being pretty ill and sick and couldn't really ride the horse that day. Also, he was known as being a really bad horse rider. Really, yeah, he was known for like being terrible at riding horse.
Speaker 2:There. There is a scene where they help him get on his horse, which I couldn't tell it. I feel like that might have been a little bit Like he was too little, too little, or like there's like I mean like who can't get on their horse is a respectful man, right, you know like now there is also like royalty is helped upon these things too, like you know you. So I couldn't tell if it was like a he has royalty so they help him up, or if it was like All right, bring out the stool. You know that sort of thing, but they might have shown. There was one scene where they showed that, but I didn't know that he was a bad horseman, huh.
Speaker 1:Yeah also, battle of Alster Litz happened on December 2nd 1805. It's the one in the movie with the frozen lake, mm-hmm. It happened on dry land. There was no bodies of water nearby, it's the whole lake thing is fiction. The idea that he was cut them off in synchum, firing cannonballs on the ice baloney, which is like part of me, is like okay, at least they, rather than telling the truth, decided to lie and make it entertaining Mm-hmm. But then I was like you know what? I Bet the truth is just more entertaining, mm-hmm, cuz it's like what if I couldn't Synch these guys in a lake real quick to end the fight scene right here? What if it's just absolute Flipping chaos in a blizzard for three months? You know, yeah, yeah. I was just like it should have been. You know, the more entertaining thing has probably fallen the fear and terror of fighting in Russia in the winter. But uh, oh yeah, also the casualties from also Litz resulted from traditional land-based combat. So imagine like, just like snow, just Scarlet red, with Mm-hmm tens, hundreds of thousands of bodies you know I mean. There is no court historical evidence to suggest and pulling ever slapped Josephine during the divorce. It's never noted by anyone who was witness to it. This is just, you know, drama for the sake of making them look like Performance abuser. Mm-hmm, I must smack you out of it, because everyone's looking to that me to lead and I have to lead you Through this divorce. You know, whatever, however they wanted to, you know, picture it, um, but it was a political decision and they Definitely remained tamed, real, amicable and continue to write to each other. That's all very true, but there is no credible source supporting the claim that Napoleon ever physically abused her During the divorce proceedings and it's often conjectured if he ever Physically abused her like there's not much record of like people like you know he would hit her or anything like that. It is no it is known that they yelled at each other all the fucking time, though Like they just, you know, screamed at each other. But anyways, all that said, those are my goofs and trivia for the movie. Go out and watch Waterloo At your buddy's house to see a sick, actual portrayal with real people. You know Waterloo's like essentially a brave heart, but just French guys with guns and Because it's it's all real actors. You know it's just before they could CGI people in. There's stuff like there's rumors that with Waterloo they had done stuff where they had like dummies I'm like Like dummies of on sacks, you know, riding horses and some like attached horses, because they're like we just don't have enough people.
Speaker 2:Well, good for them, if, if it did it and it was believable, yeah, like that's.
Speaker 1:I don't think, you like, I don't think there's a single scene in the movie. You're like oh, that's a scarecrow. Yeah but anyways, that's, that's what I got. This is already more time than I wanted to give this fucking movie, but I don't know, pat, anything else you want to add before we close it here?
Speaker 2:No man, that's it. That's it. It's a for four thumb down Well. Yeah, you're here for the beer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we give it we each give it a thumb up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay, yeah, I'm so.
Speaker 1:I'm sure, if we. Padua padua by what's the brewery?
Speaker 2:By the. Can't say it without trying to read it.
Speaker 1:I say with a Creole action, yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't rule. Yeah, padua by. Uh, what is this? It was the necklace brewery of Brassee Calier.
Speaker 1:Yeah, two thumbs up, give it a try. It's pretty good, but anyways, thanks for joining us. Ken, if you made it to the end of the show here, I just want to plug that we have a YouTube channel. Now we are working on doing Long-form video entertainment, as right now. It's just another way of getting the Podcasts out. Youtube just pulls it on over from our podcast hosting service. So if you prefer to watch things and download them from YouTube music or watch them on YouTube while you work, we are there. We have already, after only a few days, like three and a half thousand subscribers, most of which big Indian based audience. So shout out to my brothers in India. Also, like, 30% of our demographic are women in India, so shout out to my sisters in India. They really seem to like our blood reading and book review. That's like the most watched video in India right now across our videos. So nice. Anyways, maybe we'll do like a. Maybe we should do like a Bollywood movie and get an Indian beer. They just watch like the most highest Maybe not highest rated, but most like. Popular yeah, body will move. We don't drink some Indian beer? That way, give it to our, to our devoted fans. But anyways, thanks for joining us folk. We appreciate you. We hope you have an happy holidays and we hope to save you some money. But till next time.